Frederic Loves Johnny Crawford!

I had my first gay crush on actor Johnny Crawford.

I grew up in Iowa, and when I was around 10-years old, my crush was on his character, Mark McCain. And I loved him so much!

Whenever he cried on the "The Rifleman," I just wanted to hug him and kiss him all over.

I loved his pouty mouth, and that sexy, hurt crack in his voice.

This crush on Johnny was part of my secret life, so no one ever knew I loved him until years later when I told gay friends. It turns out, lots of other gay boys loved Mark McCain, too. But I didn't know that at the time.

Besides, back then - Mark was mine alone!

Thanks. Nice website!
Frederic - Phoenix, AZ
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Frank Loves Richard Crenna!

My very first gay crush was actor Richard Crenna.

I first saw him at age 6.
He was playing Luke McCoy on TV's "The Real McCoys."

I thought actress Kathleen Nolan (Hassie McCoy) was the luckiest person in the world, to have a husband as handsome as Luke.

Eagerly waiting for each weekly episode, I also began to notice Pat Boone on his show that aired just before.

I found only one other (boy) friend who also shared my interest in Crenna and Boone, and we spent hours each week with our (girl) friends, excitingly comparing their contrasting handsomeness.

Frank - Fall River, MA
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Cornelius Loves Robert Conrad!

My first gay crush was Robert Conrad, and the creative team behind the gayest show ever - "The Wild Wild West"

Every episode had the same formula:
a crazed super villain's plot was foiled by the studly Robert Conrad.

And also there is his 'friend' Artemis Gorden, a drag queen – oops, they called it 'master of disguise' in those days.


From the opening credits (where he punches a woman in the face, knocking her down), you knew this was a man's world. A world where a hard man would fight hard - with the camera on his skin-tight pants and perfect ass, please.

Once he lost the initial battle and was captured, the real fun began. Each week they found new ways to tie him up, usually shirtless, always tortured, while the sweat dripped down his face and chest so that the camera could end up back at his ass.

I know it sounds unbelievable, but I swear I remember one episode where an evil toymaker held him prisoner in a top secret toy bomb factory. The set included a few over-sized children's blocks in the background. There was something about that pre-Stonewall era that allowed the letters F, A, and G on the face of those blocks with no complaint – or awareness.

Cornelius - Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
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Click here: "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
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Nathan Loves Robert Conrad!

My first gay crush was actor Robert Conrad!

I was 12 in 1967, when I discovered Robert Conrad on "The Wild Wild West."

He played James West, the handsomest man I'd ever seen, with the bluest eyes I had ever seen.

He wore the tightest pants I had ever seen. And he had the most remarkable butt I had ever seen!

That combination, plus watching him defeat armies of thugs every week, made me want to spend my life with him. Because this was back in the mid 1960's, I knew nothing about being gay. I just knew I loved James West more than anything in the world. It took me a few more years to realize that the latter meant the former.

To this day, I still think about this TV show, and I'm not alone: there are websites devoted to the same gay crush. And there always will be, as long as there is an Internet and gay men...

Nathan - San Diego, CA
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Click here: "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
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Fritz Loves Clint Walker!

My first gay crush was actor Clint Walker.

Even at 10-years old back in 1963, I knew and had known who I was attracted to. Whether or not it could be called sexual at that age, is a moot point.

I knew who I wanted to cuddle, wrestle, kiss, spend the night with, and see naked. And it was men.

Clint Walker was the first man in these fantasies.

I watched everything I could he was in - his movies, the TV series "Cheyenne" - and always anxiously waited for the shirt to come off. As I matured and my excitement manifested itself, it was almost impossible to sit in the den and watch him on our one TV.


As this was South Georgia in the '60s, I told no one about this crush.

But it was more than just physical, though. Clint and his characters were everything I wanted to be. Strong and quiet, and in control of his emotions; a good man who had no need to prove anything to anyone. What you saw was what you got. Were they masculine cliches? Yup.

There were plenty of other male crushes back then.
Heck, I think I was excited to see almost any man with his shirt off. But faithful soul that I am, I've always kept a special place in my heart for Clint Walker.

Fritz - Stateboro, GA
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David Loves Chuck Connors!

Actor Chuck Connors was
my first gay crush.

I was a little boy in the 1950's, and one of my all time favorite TV shows was "The Rifleman."

And it was totally because of that hunk of a man, named Chuck Connors.

He made this little gay boy swoon. I was riveted to his every move in his tight jeans, which always accentuated his muscular legs and butt.

He played Lucas McCain and Johnny Crawford played Mark,
his little boy.

I wanted to be Mark, who got to hug Chuck. And ride horseback with Chuck. And just be with Chuck a lot.

It was my secret, but oh how I fantasized about my crush.

David - New York, NY
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Charlie Loves Chuck Connors!

I'd say my first gay crush was Chuck Connors.

He played the role of Lucas McCain on the 50's TV show, "The Rifleman."

Even his TV son, played by Johnny Crawford, gave me a little twinge.

Even now I still have a bit of a thing for cowboy fantasies. But did I let anyone know about my crush?

I don't think I would have had the words to explain it. Being gay in the 1950's was inconceivable.

Charlie - Washington, DC
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Victor Loves Robert Conrad!

My first gay crush was
actor Robert Conrad.

I've known I liked boys since I was 4. But by the time puberty hit at age 11? I knew I liked men!

I had boy crushes, but my biggest thrill was Friday nights, watching the hot man who wore THE tightest pants in TV history:

Mr. Robert Conrad on
"The Wild Wild West."

He played a daredevil Secret Service agent named James T. West on the campy show. His character was a "real man" who did a lot of acrobatic stunts, often took his shirt off, and got tied up a lot.

Whoah! I didn't know anything about camp, let alone bondage and discipline. But I know I sure liked to see him tied up and shirtless.

My taste in men has changed over the years, but you never forget your first - with tight pants, sexy furry chest, and a glint in his blue eyes,

I realized way back in '65 you really can't separate the men from the boys -- except for maybe with a crowbar.


Victor - New York, NY
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Click here: "Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay" book
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Dave Loves Pernell Roberts!

My first gay crush was Pernell Roberts
on TV's "Bonanza."

Growing up in rural Mississippi in the 60's, I busied myself with the world of television.

My other fave shows were "The Fugitive" (especially for David Janssen) and "Lost In Space." 

But I felt Dr. Smith was rather "queeny," and I wondered why Will Robinson's parents allowed their son around such a flamboyant man.

Matt Dillon on "Gunsmoke" was another arousal back then, too. But it was seeing Pernell Roberts' chest hair on "Bonanza" that sealed it for me - that I was not like the other boys in the neighborhood.

And, I wasn't concentrating on how to play Cowboys & Indians - I was concentrating on him.

I'd hoped when the cast of "Bonanza" was in town at the state fair that I'd get to meet him. 

Instead, they sent Michael Landon to represent the cast, and it was my older brother who was fascinated to meet him.



And for me, to this day, a man with a hairy chest will always get my fancy. Thanks to Pernell Roberts.

Dave - Jackson, MS
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